Thursday, July 15, 2010

The Bizarre Events Fairy Casts Her Evil Spell On Me

Last Friday's blog post was on eradicating mental chatter.  Saturday, I was faced with the choice of having to walk my talk or eat my words.

So what happened?  I can't really share details.  Too risky.  Let's just say the Bizarre Events Fairy loves me best. There have been years when I have been certain I was her pet project.  I have a history of suspiciously weird, inconceivable events unfolding before my eyes. So last week, it happened. Again. What are the odds? I repeated to myself over and again. It was impossible, yet it was reality. It was as if I'd been hit with a stun gun for the second time in mere months. 
The Bizarre Events Fairy appears sweet and innocent, but she has a way of messing in people's lives when they least expect it.
I told my kids.  My son emailed back from Geneva, “Wow, that's really horrible … really awful. Sorry.” My daughter had much to say about it that day since we spent two hours on the phone and two more in the car together on Saturday. Fortunately, she's wise beyond her years and asked some great rhetorical questions.

I found myself processing “my stuff.”  Saturday afternoon, I was at a wedding trying to focus on having fun with my friends and other wedding guests. But my thoughts were elsewhere.  What? Why? How? For some reason, I kept mentally rewinding to a conversation I'd had with a friend earlier this year. That conversation may turn out to be one of the more pivotal ones I have had in the last ten years. When the student is ready, the teacher appears. And I was ready.

I danced and danced and danced. The wedding reception was non-stop music for hours.  And I danced.  Not yoga, not jogging or speed walking, but physical exertion of substantial proportions set to loud disco music saved me. I was a tribal warrior goddess on that dance floor. An advisor said once that dancing is a form of meditation for me, one that I should do daily. I quite agree. The mental chatter was gone. My mind was emptied. I let it go.
Good fairies prefer to hang out in in the forest with other fairies, until they're needed to provide ball gowns, carriages, or other such miracles. To my knowledge, they don't whiten teeth and eradicate crows feet.
I became clear, crystal clear.   By late Saturday night, not only did I understand exactly what had happened but what my future course of action would be. Bring it on, Bizarre Events Fairy! Go ahead. Wave your magic wand and see if I care. I'm grounded, and I'm definitely not going to squirm even if your stupid and harmless lightening bolt strikes again. I'm wiser now.  I have learned to see beyond surface happenings to the underlying reality.  I will pass up opportunities that don't reflect my core values.

I'm enjoying the show.  I've said it before, when the going gets rough, think of life as a movie.  Some stories unfold in a way as to provide the ultimate in entertainment.  So far this week, I'm so enjoying the show.  And it's not over yet.  {humming softly now}

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